


Ring Rat Confessions

by kenjideath



Category: Professional Wrestling, World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Blogging, M/M, Numbing Cream, Premature Ejaculation, Prostate Milking, Rimming, Small Penis, Spanking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-08
Updated: 2016-02-08
Packaged: 2018-05-19 03:40:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5952351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kenjideath/pseuds/kenjideath
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean's bad press starts to bite him the ass, where "bad press" means "people he's banged blogging about how bad he was." Thankfully, he is a brilliant strategist who is more than capable of dealing with this problem.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ring Rat Confessions

**Author's Note:**

> Soooo for some reason I started reading ring rat confession blogs while I couldn't sleep and I'm don't think a single word of any of them are true, but the consensus is that Dean is selfish and doesn't care if you get off or not, while Seth loves the booty and can't last. Obviously, this information begged for bad porn.

Dean didn’t get what the big deal was about sex. The orgasms were better than what he could get from masturbating, sure, but there was so much bullshit to get through. Picking up, getting the girl to a room, negotiating the condom, then the girl would get bitchy about how she didn’t come or whatever when he just wanted to go to sleep. Not to mention how boring sex itself was, just thrusting over and over for minutes on end. It was like doing reps at the gym but without anything to show for it later.

Yeah, it was safe to say that sex was more tedious than anything these days, but that didn’t mean that Dean was ready for it when women stopped throwing themselves at his dick.

\---

“It’s fucking ridiculous,” Dean bitched to Seth. They were sprawled on the bed in Dean’s hotel room, drinking some beers. Dean was on his fourth Bud Light and Seth was still sipping the nerdy craft beer he’d brought with him. Usually they’d go to a bar, but this wasn’t a conversation Dean wanted to have in public. “I haven’t had to go home alone since the Jon Moxley days. Chicks would fall all over themselves just for the chance to jerk me off. Now suddenly I’m supposed to make it worth their while? It’s fucking bullshit.”

“What exactly did she say?” Seth asked. He wasn’t displaying the proper amount of sympathy for Dean’s plight, but Dean was used to Seth falling down on guy shit like this.

“She said that she read on the Internet that I wasn’t worth her time,” Dean groused. He took a bitter swig of beer. “She’s the sixth girl to say some shit like that. Every day now it’s all, oh, some fucking blog told me you’re not worth it. News fucking flash people, sex isn’t that great, it’s not my fucking fault.”

Seth shrugged. “I don’t know what to tell you, man.” He took another sip of his prissy beer. “No one’s worth it, in my opinion. I stopped hooking up a while ago.”

Now, that was news to Dean. “Seriously?” he asked. “You don’t fuck at all?”

Seth didn’t make eye contact with him, preferring to fiddle with the label on his beer. “It’s just a lot of hassle, you know?” he said.

Dean could tell that Seth was bullshitting him at least a little, but he couldn’t focus on that right now. He was too busy having one of the greatest ideas of his life.

“You and me should fuck,” Dean announced. Seth startled so bad he slopped beer onto the bed.

“We _what_ ,” he demanded.

Dean grinned broadly. He wasn’t going to be brought down by Seth’s prudishness, not today. “You and me, right here, right now,” Dean said. “No strings, no explanations, no fucking bar small talk, just dicks in asses. C’mon, I’ll even let you go first.”

Dean would have laughed at Seth’s look of wide-eyed horror if it wasn’t standing between him and getting his dick wet. “Dude, I know you aren’t gay-panicking on me now,” Dean said. He nudged Seth’s knee with his foot. “Your favorite thing is ass anyway, right? It’s not like there’s a difference there.”

Now Seth looked horrified and pink. “I just… don’t know if that’s such a good idea…” Seth said, like the bitch he was.

Dean rolled his eyes. “Come on, it’s not like sex is worth all the hassle, right?”

Seth dropped his eyes. “Well, yeah,” he mumbled.

“So let’s just get off and stop worrying about it.” Seth still didn’t look convinced, but luckily, Dean had a great idea. He hopped of the bed and yanked his belt off. The strangled sound Seth made confirmed that he was on the right track.

Grinning, Dean shoved his pants and underwear down to his knees and wiggled his hips at Seth in what he was sure was an enticing manner. “Tell me you don’t want to get in this,” Dean said.

Dean felt the hesitant – almost reverent – touch of Seth’s hands cupping his ass. “Holy shit,” Seth said breathlessly. “How many squats are you doing these days?”

Dean preened. He could always count on Seth to appreciate his hard work. “Too fucking many,” he bitched, pressing his ass back into the gentle caress of Seth’s thumbs. “I’ve never looked better in my life, and I gotta hide this masterpiece in jeans all the time. It’s a goddamn disgrace.”

Seth traced his hands over the firm globes of Dean’s ass before sliding his thumbs into the crease to hold him open. Dean couldn’t stop the shiver that ran down his spine when he felt the merest flicker of a tongue over his hole.

“Okay,” Seth said, his voice sounding absolutely trashed, “what can we use as lube?”

Dean always won.

\---

Dean did have lube, because he wasn’t some kind of heathen, and it wasn’t like he’d never fucked a chick in the ass before so he just stripped down and gave himself some fingers, no point in making a huge production out of it. Seth stumbled out of his clothes to reveal an erection so hard it was bumping against his stomach, which Dean admittedly found a little bit flattering. Everyone with internet access knew that Seth wasn’t exactly over endowed by now, but Dean didn’t get what the big deal was. He thought that Seth’s cock was cute, way more aesthetically pleasing than the baseball bat Roman had between his legs. Dean could probably cover the whole thing with one hand, a thought that for some reason made his stomach tighten with excitement.

Dean’s motto was “get in, get off, get out,” so he opted to press Seth down onto the bed and throw a leg over him, hold Seth’s (already dripping, wow, Dean knew he was hot but _damn_ ) cock steady so he could sink down on it.

It was the first cock that had ever been in Dean’s ass and it burned a little, but he was no bitch so he just rolled his hips and eased himself down. Seth threw an arm over his eyes and let out a shaky wail like some kinda porn star, which was pleasantly distracting enough for Dean to start fucking himself.

After a couple thrusts, Dean could sorta see the appeal of it. The burn had died down to a pleasant sort of stretch and there were clearly more nerve endings in his ass than he’d known about because little shocks of pleasure were rippling up his spine. The best part was having Seth beneath him, a non-stop symphony of the sweetest little begging noises Dean had ever heard. Dean had barely gotten started and Seth was already writhing around, drumming his heels into the bed, driving his hips up into Dean –

Seth let out a desperate, keening cry and went stiff all over. Dean froze.  Was he losing his mind and had Seth just…

“Bro, did you just come?” he asked, not quite able to believe it, even though he could feel the wet heat in his ass. Dean knew his ass was great and all, but it had seriously been like five strokes.

Seth tried to get up but Dean was still perched on his dick, so it was easy to keep him pinned to the bed. Seth settled for pressing his hands over his eyes instead.

“I’m sorry,” he said, miserably. “I thought maybe this time… because you’re on top and a guy and all, maybe it wouldn’t be as… fuck. Fuck!” Seth slammed a hand onto the bed.

Dean started laughing, which made his muscles do weird things around Seth’s softening dick, but he couldn’t help it. “Oh shit,” he said. “That’s why you stopped hooking up, right? Not because of the girls but because you’ve got a hair trigger. Oh my god, holy shit.”

Seth flopped his head to the side and tried to bury his face in the pillow, obviously trying to escape Dean laughing at him. Dean leaned down a planted a huge, wet kiss on Seth’s forehead. “How precious,” Dean cooed.

“Ugh, fuck off,” Seth said. He was still flushed bright red but looked a little less panicked, like he’d realized that Dean wasn’t going to do worse than some light ribbing.

“Hmmm, I don’t know,” Dean said. He tugged himself off Seth’s dick. “That was a nice little warm up, but I think you owe me one.” Dean gave Seth a hearty clap on the thigh, making him jump. “Turn over, princess.”

Seth stared at Dean for a minute, then seemed to realize that he really couldn’t protest this. He groaned and rolled over, presenting his tight little ass for Dean’s inspection.

Dean whistled at the sight of it. “Very nice,” he said. He poured more lube over his fingers. He couldn’t shake the feeling that he should have been more annoyed about Seth losing it back there, but ultimately, the sex had been so brief that it wasn’t even frustrating. It was just a little appetizer, and Dean was feeling ready for the main course.

Never one to waste time, Dean pressed his slick index finger into Seth. He was expecting maybe a gasp or for Seth to tense up in pain, but instead Seth let out a hoarse shout and threw his hips back into the intrusion. Dean stared at the back of his head for a second, then started to finger fuck him at a sedate pace.

By the time Dean added a second finger, he had to press his free hand to Seth’s back to keep him from writhing himself straight off the bed. Seth was biting the pillow, probably trying to muffle himself, but it was pretty useless considering that the slightest change in pressure made guttural noises of pleasure spill out of his throat. Bizarrely, Dean felt almost dizzy with lust. Usually foreplay was a chore, something to get through as fast as possible before he could get wet heat on his dick. It was like stretching before a workout – necessary, but nothing to linger on. The girls he fucked seemed to agree with him; nobody had ever been overjoyed by his fingers in their vagina and more than a few had told him to just get on with it.

Nobody had ever lost their fucking mind the way that Seth was doing right now. Dean curled his fingers around to graze Seth’s prostate and Seth almost jackknifed straight of the bed. “ _Holy fucking shit_ ,” Seth shouted. His voice was already hoarse. This was the best fucking idea Dean had ever had in his entire _life_.

Dean could see that Seth’s flushed cock was hard again, bouncing a little as Seth thrust back against Dean’s fingers. On a hunch, Dean slid a hand under Seth’s stomach and pushed him up, forcing him to get up on his knees.

“Wha… what…” Seth craned to look over his shoulder. He was flushed and sweaty and panting. He batted a hand at his face to try and pull the hair out of his mouth. He looked fucking gorgeous and Dean couldn’t wait to take him for a ride.

“You were rubbing against the sheets,” Dean explained. “Didn’t want you going off too early again.”

Seth’s ears turned red and he dropped his head back to the pillow.

When Dean pressed three fingers in and Seth actually screamed, Dean was officially done with waiting, as unexpectedly hot as this had turned out to be. He shifted Seth’s hips into position, gave him a tight squeeze as a heads up, and started to press his dick inside.

Usually, Dean would have plowed right in, but as soon as the fat head of his cock popped inside, Seth started shuddering like he might break apart.  Dean took it slow, not wanting to hurt Seth or make his head explode from sensory overload or something. He started a gentle rhythm of pressing a half inch or so deeper, pausing to let Seth adjust, and then moving again. It felt incredible. Of course it was tight and wet and hot, it always was, but the feeling seemed… more, somehow, all-encompassing in way it usually wasn’t, full of subtle nuances to savor.

It might have had something to do with the way Seth was so clearly loving it. He was making such desperate, broken noises into the pillow, mouth open and eyes glazed as his fingers twisted uselessly in the sheets.

Dean started to thrust, taking it slower than he usually would. There didn’t seem to be any need for fast and dirty, not when Seth was clearly already blind from pleasure and Dean was enjoying the sweet clench of his ass. Dean’s eyes slipped closed and he focused on just rolling his hips, letting the gentle drag on skin on skin send him flying.

“You’re just fucking loving this, aren’t you?” Dean asked when a particularly vicious clench of Seth’s ass made lights flash behind his eyes.

“Oh, fucking – god jesus,” Seth gasped. Dean opened his eyes to see Seth twisted in pleasure, fingers clenched so tight in the bedsheets it was a miracle that they hadn’t torn yet. “It’s never – never – ” Seth took a heaving breath and reached for his cock.

Dean acted without thinking, grabbing Seth’s hand and pulling it behind Seth’s back. “Nope,” he said, throwing a harder thrust to make his point. Seth sobbed.

“Need – need it, please,” Seth panted. “Need to come, I – ” Seth let his upper body collapse into the bed so he could reach for his swollen cock with his other hand, but Dean intercepted that one just as easily.

Dean was no stranger to feeling powerful during sex, but over the years, it had become an empty sort of power. It didn’t mean anything, it was all fake. He was using these women as they used him, and next week they’d both do it again with someone else. It didn’t change anything.

This, pinning Seth’s wrists behind his back and shifting his thrusts to make sure Seth didn’t get hurt now that he couldn’t support himself, felt different. It felt… Dean didn’t know. Productive?

“Don’t worry, baby,” he panted out. “I won’t let you slip over. You’re going to have a real satisfying come this time, trust me.”

Seth’s moans sounded almost anguished now. Dean tightened his grip on Seth’s wrists and started to really give it to him, tight, hard thrusts right where Seth needed it most. It was magnificent. It felt great, as usual, but more importantly, Seth’s obvious bliss – were those actual tears in his eyes? Holy shit – was doing fuckin’ wonders for Dean’s ego.

None of it compared to the sheer fucking rush Dean felt when Seth choked, tightened up, and started to shoot, his stupidly hard cock emptying its load without a hand on him. Dean could hardly fucking believe it, but pushed past his shock to give Seth a fist to fuck, making sure that Seth got the full effect of every shuddering clench of the orgasm Dean was giving him.

When Seth finally collapsed, too exhausted to move except for the fine tremors that wracked every inch of his body, Dean was riding the edge pretty closely himself. He seriously considered just humping away at Seth’s prone body, but he was kinda worried that any more pleasure might actually kill him. So Dean pulled out and jerked off onto Seth’s back instead.

Seth didn’t even flinch when Dean’s hot come hit his back, but the sight of it sent an extra curl of heat to Dean’s stomach, made his balls contract extra hard as he shot. Dean had done that for Seth, made him feel so good it had practically knocked him out.

Dean let himself drop heavily next to Seth. “They should start calling me the ass master,” he said. Seth grunted. He was still trembling, like Dean had actually shorted him out. Dean threw an arm over him, rubbed a soothing thumb over the back of his neck. “The prostate master,” Dean continued.

“The booty master,” Seth mumbled, his voice partially muffled by the pillow.

Dean grinned at him, feeling loose-limbed and content. “Hell yeah,” he said. Dean was pleased to call the experiment a success.

\---

The next week, Dean finally found a girl willing to go back to his room. On a whim, he did some of the stuff that had really done it for Seth, paying attention to the touches she seemed to like, the parts of her body that made her tremble with arousal. He paced his thrusts to her speed and split his attention between his wants and hers. He was even pretty sure that she wasn’t faking when she had an orgasm.

It gave him some of that pleased feeling – tell the message boards about _that_ , bitch, he’d wanted to shout – and it had been better than usual, but it was still… Well, a probably-real orgasm didn’t have anything on Seth’s full-body, screaming, untouched peak.

A couple days later, he and Seth got buzzed and made out in Seth’s hotel room. “There’s something that I kind of wanted to do the other day,” Seth said, and Dean ended up naked and arching into Seth’s mouth as he got his ass eaten for what felt like hours.

“How do you even have feeling left in your tongue?” Dean asked, sprawled limp in his own mess.

Seth still had his face nuzzled up to Dean’s ass, but now he was just resting, instead of giving his tongue the workout of a lifetime. “Totally worth it,” Seth said, speech slurred and a little bit dreamy.

Dean let Seth rub off on his thigh. He felt kind of bad when Seth came in under a minute after so thoroughly rocking Dean’s world, but Seth didn’t seem to mind, so Dean let it drop.

The next time Dean took a girl back to his room, he rimmed her some before the main event, trying to recreate Seth’s fancy tongue work. He couldn’t imitate most of it, but she seemed pleased enough. He awarded himself a check mark for the encounter.

Later, Dean let Seth spank him. It wasn’t something he’d ever done before; he was slow to trust and quick to fuck someone and leave, but he figured if he could trust Seth to safely pretend to stomp his head through cinderblocks, he could trust him with this. Seth didn’t hit that hard, it was more of a light sting than true pain, but it turned Dean’s crank like crazy. When it got to be too much, Dean flipped Seth onto his back and fucked him low and tight, Seth arching up to grab to Dean’s ass. If Seth had been gorgeous from the back, he was goddamn breathtaking from the front, especially when Dean carefully stroked Seth against his own stomach, tipping him forcefully over the edge.

Dean tried to think about letting some stranger spank him without being choked by anxiety, but couldn’t manage it. The next time that a girl nuzzled up to him at a bar, Dean thought Seth sprawled out on a bed back at the hotel, eyes half-lidded as he scrolled on his phone, a tantalizing strip of stomach visible as his shirt rode up.

Dean stopped taking girls back to his hotel room.

\---

Dean and Seth didn’t start dating or anything lame like that, but Dean wasn’t hooking up anymore and Seth had never started again, so they were exclusively fucking each other. The kept doing crazy shit together and it kept being amazing. Dean got Seth off just by playing with his nipples. Seth let Dean put a bullet vibe up his ass and Dean spent hours turning it on and off until Seth came so many times he wasn’t even shooting spunk anymore. They spent two consecutive days off working up to Seth putting his fist in Dean’s ass and it was worth every goddamn second.

They did pretty much everything two people could do together, except for one big thing. Seth just _couldn’t_ last long enough to fuck Dean up the ass.

It was starting to get frustrating. Getting fucked up the ass by Seth wasn’t, like, a long-term goal of Dean’s or anything, but the fact that he couldn’t do it pissed him off.

Thankfully, the nice lady at the sex toy shop was more than happy to help him work out a solution.

\---

“We really don’t have to try this again,” Seth said. He was lying on his back on the bed again. They were both naked and Dean was going to come on that cock if it killed him.

“Don’t sweat it, sweetcheeks,” Dean said, digging around in the plastic bag he’d brought with him. Where the fuck had he put it? “I’ve worked it all out. We are going to lock your hair trigger _down_.” Aha! There it was.

Dean turned around triumphantly and held up the little tube. Seth didn’t look reassured. “What… is it?” he asked.

Dean beamed at him. “Penis desensitizing cream,” he said. Seth didn’t look properly excited by this information, but Dean was more than ready to demonstrate its benefits.

The first blob of cream on Seth’s dick made him hiss at the cold. “Sorry,” Dean said insincerely. “Soon it won’t matter.” Dean made sure to keep his strokes slow and careful as he rubbed the cream it. It would just be stupid if Seth shot off before he could go numb.

“Just relax,” Dean ordered. Seth tried to obey, took long slow breaths as Dean massaged his cock until the cream disappeared, absorbed into the skin.

Then he dumped some more on.

When Seth shot him a look that clearly read, “Really?” Dean just shrugged. Better safe than sorry, that’s what he said.

By the time the second layer of cream was absorbed, Seth had pushed himself up and was staring at his dick like he’d never seen it before. Experimentally, Dean wrapped a hand around it and gave it a couple swift jerks. “Feel that?” he asked.

Seth stared at his dick with something like wonderment. “No,” he said. “There’s some… pressure, I guess, but… I can’t really feel it at all.”

That probably shouldn’t have made Dean squirm with arousal, but it definitely did. His hands were shaking a little as he rolled the condom on. Seth fell back onto the pillows. “This is so weird,” he said.

Dean let out a hoarse laugh. “It sure fucking is,” he said. He dumped some lube on Seth’s cock and Seth, staring at the ceiling, didn’t even notice. Dean’s cock twitched so hard he started to worry that _he_ might lose it too soon.

Dean straddled Seth and held his cock steady, getting ready to sink down. “Okay?” he asked.

Seth’s fingers were clenched tightly in the sheets. “Yeah,” he said.

Dean lowered himself slowly onto Seth’s dick. Dean had spent some quality time with his fingers earlier so it slid in nice and easy, just enough of a stretch to make his toes curl. He rolled his hips experimentally, letting the maelstrom of sensation force a groan out of his mouth.

“Is it – is it in?” Seth panted. Dean forced his eyes to focus. Seth’s knuckles were white from strain, his bottom lip was wet from his teeth. Dean wanted to kiss him or tweak his nipples or something, but how dumb would it be if he still set Seth off after all this?

“Oh, it’s in baby,” Dean told him. Seth let out the sweetest little whimper he had ever heard and Dean couldn’t wait anymore, he had to get his fill of cock right _now_.

It was like a good workout, the pleasant stretch and burn of muscles being used the right way. Pretty soon, Dean realized that it didn’t really matter to Seth what he did, so he took his time, tried out different motions, experimented with depth. Seth gasped out a steady, “Oh, oh, oh,” regardless. A couple minutes in, Dean stumbled onto an angle that dragged Seth’s dick perfectly over his inner wall, putting pressure in all the right places and ending each drop with a perfect little nudge on his prostate.

“Oh, fuck me, just like that baby,” Dean groaned, mimicking the motion over and over again. Seth’s sweet little dick was the perfect length to hit that spot just right. It was a full, rich pleasure, lapping its way further and further up his spine with every thrust. Dean’s cock was definitely into it, twitching and drooling to show his interest. A few drop of pre pooled on Seth’s stomach and Dean reached down to rub them in. Seth acted like Dean had just swallowed his dick, moaning and arching into the touch, but his cock stayed hard and his balls stayed full.

Despite his ache to come, Dean felt like he could do this forever. It was goddamn glorious, everything from the ache in his knees to the stretch of his rim, from the stimulation of his prostate to the lovely tears dripping down Seth’s cheeks. He closed his eyes and tipped his head back, just relishing the moment, so he wasn’t expecting it when Seth’s hands wandered up his thighs, stroking and massaging the straining muscles, before wrapping around his fat cock to give him sharp, clean strokes.

It was Dean’s first orgasm mostly from prostate stimulation and it was a bit like getting hit from behind by a surprisingly strong wave. One second he was wallowing in pulse after pulse of _goodgreatyes_ , and then he was fucking drowning in it, the shuddering contractions all he could feel, eyes crossing from the intensity of it as he painted Seth with his come.

Distantly, Dean wondered if Seth had gotten off on his tightening ass, and then realized that no, he didn’t. An aftershock raced through Dean’s body, pulling a whimper out of him.

Seth looked a little bit shellshocked, his eyes wide and leaking while his bright red mouth lay popped open. He was trembling, and Dean felt a surge of affection so strong it almost dwarfed his orgasm.

Dean clapped Seth on the stomach as he dismounted. “Good game, buddy,” he said, still a little breathless. “Nice hustle out there.”

The strangled sound that Seth made might have been a laugh. It might also have been overwhelming lust. Dean hedged his bets by rolling the condom off Seth’s dick, eager to get him off.

As soon as Dean wrapped a slick hand around Seth’s cock, Seth was rutting into it, grunting each time Dean’s fist hit his public bone. Despite the numbing cream, Seth’s glans was still bright red. Seth’s muscles jumped and twitched as he fucked forward eagerly, struggling to come.

When his cheeks and chest were flushed from the strain, he finally gave up and collapsed again. “Can’t – can’t –” Seth panted.

Dean patted his thigh sympathetically. “Still can’t feel it?” he asked.

Seth just whimpered in reply, his hips twitching uselessly. He looked absolutely taken apart and gorgeous. Dean traced his fingers over sensitive skin to tap as Seth’s hole. “Don’t worry,” he said. “I’ve got ya, babe. You want to get milked?”

Dean got his hand slick while Seth rolled over and pushed himself onto shaking hands and knees. He opened up so easily for Dean’s fingers, an unrestrained sob bursting out of him. Impossibly, Seth seemed even more sensitive than normal, like the nerve endings in his ass were working overtime to compensate for his numb cock.

Dean massaged Seth’s prostate gently, keeping his pace steady even while Seth tried to shake himself apart.

“Hah… hah…” Seth was panting, covered in sweat. Dean rested his free hand on Seth’s back, trying to steady him. Seth kept clamping down on Dean’s fingers in a way that made Dean’s limp dick twitch to get inside, but Dean ignored the impulse; this wasn’t about him. He kept the pressure gentle and steady and constant, relishing Seth’s desperate whining cries.

“C’mon, baby, let it out,” Dean murmured, and Seth’s arms gave out. He planted face-first onto the bed, sobs wracking his body, and his dick jerked, pulsed, and finally started to drip.

The first stream of come leaked out in one long, steady dribble. It reminded Dean more of piss than an orgasm. He kept on massaging Seth’s prostate, wanting to really empty him out. After the third time Seth keened his way through an overwhelming non-orgasm, he collapsed, completely limp. Dean tried to pull his fingers out slowly, but it still made a shudder rip its way through Seth’s body.

Dean flopped down next to Seth, throwing an arm over him. “Holy fucking shit,” he said. Seth made a garbled sound in response. The bed was absolutely disgusting, stained all over with sweat and jizz and lube and the not-quite-jizz Dean had worked out of Seth. Dean couldn’t stop grinning.

Dean had thought that he’d already hit his awesome idea quota for the week – hell, the year – with this stunt, but suddenly he had one that absolutely topped it. He nudged at Seth’s shoulder with his head. “Hey,” he said. “Be my boyfriend.”

“Guh,” Seth said. He rolled his head to look at Dean. “Huh?” he asked. He still looked thrown-through-three-tables dazed. Dean wanted to kiss him, so he did.

“Be my boyfriend,” Dean repeated.

Seth blinked. “Okay,” he said.

Dean beamed at him. “You’re the GOAT, man,” he said. Seth blushed and hid his face in the pillow again.

Dean tugged Seth’s limp body into spooning position and nuzzled into his neck. Within minutes, Seth’s breathing slowed in sleep. Dean closed his eyes, still riding high on self-satisfaction. Maybe this story would never make itself onto a blog, but it didn’t matter. The two of them, the ones that mattered, knew that they were five-star lays. Fuck the gossip.

Still, Dean thought as he drifted off to sleep, those sites were anonymous anyway, right? Technically, there was no reason this story _couldn’t_ make it out there. And Seth liked to write anyway, right?

“I’m such a fucking genius,” Dean murmured into the back of Seth’s neck, and then he was asleep.


End file.
